funnierwithwine

A humorous look at the little things in life

I KNEW I wasn’t as worthless as everyone said May 28, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — ashleyolsonrosen @ 10:37 pm

Recommended wine for today’s entry: I think a Toasted Head Merlot, because I have to admit, it’s going to be hard for me not to get a big head — as you’ll soon understand — and a merlot seems to be a good choice for projecting a polished, professional image.

I’m writing today’s entry in the hope that you, my four loyal readers, won’t find me arrogant or boastful, but I received a letter in the mail yesterday that held some totally unexpected, but exciting, news.

It seems that I was recently named as a biographical candidate to represent Kentucky in the 2009/2010 Online Registry of the Area’s Most Respected Executives and Professionals.
I know! Me, a candidate! I couldn’t believe it either! After calling my mother, my brother, my sister, my daughters (well, they were upstairs, so I texted them) and most of my friends, I donned my reading glasses and grabbed a legal pad and a highlighter (as a good professional always does) to delve into the juicy details. Oh, and a glass of wine. Because, even with all these accolades, I’m still me.

It seems that someone from the Managing Director’s office selects people based on their current positions, and they also get information by researching executive and professional listings.  These people do their homework, you see. This is not just the “Who’s Who of High School Students,” although I don’t mean to disparage that entity. That organization also allowed you the opportunity to buy the behemoth book that contained your name in minute letters that not even my reading glasses could enlarge to a readable size. No, this is the big one. This is by appointment of the MANAGING DIRECTOR.

And, assuming I am selected, I will be listed among thousands of accomplished individuals in the online registry.  OMG, if I do say so myself. Among thousands? I wonder if there’s an induction ceremony, where I could actually meet…actually shake hands with … the MANAGING DIRECTOR. If so, I’m going to have to go shopping because my only good clothes are old Derby dresses and this will certainly call for a more polished and conservative look.

And here’s my promise to you, my friends: Once I have been approved by the Managing Director, I will do everything in my power to see that you receive the same letter, the same opportunity for listing in this online directory.

What, not qualified? Ah, you underestimate yourself. After all, I haven’t worked full-time or as an executive since 1992. But that just shows you the kind of impact I must have made and the legacy that keeps my name front-of-mind among the People Who Matter. Little did I know, when I bailed out of the radio business oh those long 17 years ago, that my work would have such a lasting effect.

As I said, I am trying not to be braggy, but it’s hard, what with this on top of just last week getting an e-mail from a prince in Nigeria’s family who wants to deposit money with me. And the family even referred to me as “my most precious dear!” Again, after careful research …

Like I said, pretty heady stuff, huh?

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2 Responses to “I KNEW I wasn’t as worthless as everyone said”

  1. Jody Says:

    I am so proud of you!! I knew I had friends in high places…

  2. Bmmy Says:

    you are really going places love your blog!!!


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